Women don’t become leaders because they are confident. They become confident because someone gave them an opportunity and today’s leaders have a responsibility to do the same.
By Dorcas Dlamini Mbele, Senior Director, Commercial, Sub-Saharan Africa, Marriott International
We spend a great deal of time encouraging women to be more confident. Yet after conversations with five General Managers leading hotels in Marriott International’s portfolio across South Africa, I’ve come to believe confidence is rarely where leadership begins.
Instead, leadership often starts when someone sees potential before we see it ourselves and offers us an opportunity before we feel ready.
That feels particularly relevant as South Africa marks Women’s Month under the theme Empowered Women Empower the Nation. Representation matters. Seeing women in leadership inspires others to believe it is possible. But representation is the outcome. The more important question is what creates women leaders in the first place.
The women I spoke to followed different paths, yet their stories shared a striking pattern. Someone opened a door, and they found the courage to walk through it before confidence caught up.
For Bosele Mogamisi, General Manager of Protea Hotel by Marriott Midrand, that moment came through an internship in the United States. Working in an unfamiliar country while taking on significant responsibility taught her that growth doesn’t wait for certainty.
“The best advice I ever received was not to wait until I felt 100% ready before pursuing an opportunity. Growth often happens when we step into situations that challenge us and stretch our capabilities,” she says.
For Shirley April, General Manager of Protea Hotel by Marriott Polokwane Landmark, leadership was shaped by years of deliberate development. She credits development programmes that challenged her thinking, broadened her perspective and prepared her for greater responsibility.
Her experience reinforced an important lesson that talent alone isn’t enough. Women need organisations that invest in their growth long before they reach senior leadership.
Listening to these conversations, I realised that none of these women described confidence as something they possessed from the outset. They described it as something they built through stretch assignments, continuous learning, difficult decisions and leaders who invested in their potential before they fully recognised it themselves.
That same belief now shapes how they lead others.
Amy Elliot, General Manager of Protea Hotel by Marriott Johannesburg Wanderers, credits leaders who encouraged her to pursue opportunities she might otherwise have overlooked. Today, she advises women to “own your ambitions unapologetically, seek opportunities that challenge you, advocate for your achievements, and invest in building a strong network of sponsors and mentors.”
For Tania Malan, General Manager of AC Hotel by Marriott Cape Town Waterfront, leadership took on a different meaning the day she became responsible for an entire hotel.
“Nothing prepares you until you’re sitting in the chair,” she says.
The role required her to move from departmental leader to custodian of a business, balancing the needs of guests, employees, owners and the brand. Along the way, she let go of the need to prove she belonged in every room she entered. She realised she wasn’t invited there by accident. She had earned her place.
Today, she encourages women to stop trying to prove their worth and focus on the value they create. Understand the business. Learn the numbers as well as the people. As she says, “Hotels don’t succeed because of beautiful buildings. They succeed because of people.”
This is the real evolution of leadership: moving beyond proving yourself to creating the conditions for others to succeed.
Bridgette Ngono, General Manager of Protea Hotel by Marriott Karridene Beach, has seen what happens when organisations deliberately invest in women’s development. Today, more than 70% of her hotel’s leadership team consists of women who have progressed through the organisation because they were trusted with opportunities to grow.
“When women are given the tools, support and opportunities to succeed, they do more than build successful careers. They help build stronger businesses, stronger communities and ultimately stronger economies for all.”
To me, that is the deeper meaning behind this year’s Women’s Month theme. Empowerment goes beyond celebrating the women who have reached leadership positions. It requires creating the conditions for many more to get there.
The women I spoke to were each given an opportunity before they felt ready. They embraced uncertainty, stepped outside their comfort zones and grew through the experience. Today, their greatest achievement is not the doors they walked through, but the ones they choose to open for other women.
